


In The Mood For Love

by lostin_space



Series: Time After Time 2020❤️️ [5]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Biphobia, Cheating, Falling In Love, Happy Ending, M/M, Romance, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:55:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23681188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostin_space/pseuds/lostin_space
Summary: Alex's husband is cheating, Michael's wife is cheating, and they're both just desperate to understand why.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Series: Time After Time 2020❤️️ [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1699378
Comments: 13
Kudos: 128
Collections: Time After Time: A Roswell New Mexico Alternate Era AU Event





	In The Mood For Love

**Author's Note:**

> for day 5 of time after time event: movie fusion!  
> this is based on In The Mood For Love (dir. Wong Kar-wai) which is literally impossible to find with English subtitles and I don't actually remember how I watched it for the first time with that being the case, but it's one the best romance movies I've ever seen despite the ending not being nearly as happy as this one
> 
> hope you enjoy!

Maybe Alex was foolish to trust him.

David was nice and kind when they married and Alex loved him. He loved having a husband, someone to curl up to at the end of the night, someone to kiss, someone to take care of and to be taken care of by. He didn’t even mind that Alex had lost his leg not long after their wedding. Of course, like any marriage, the honeymoon phase wore off and now, two years later, it felt like he’d downgraded from husband to roommate. David worked long shifts, sometimes even going on business trips and leaving Alex alone for days.

Alex’s loneliness rose when they moved into their new apartment. He’d seen their next-door neighbors: a husband and wife, both beautiful in their own way. The wife looked familiar somehow, but Alex never pressed because it wasn’t his business. However, he noticed that the wife was gone often as well. He almost felt sorry for her husband until he realized he was in the same position. 

They passed each other nearly every night, Alex and her husband, as they crossed paths to fetch dinner at the market a block away. Most times, he was on his way home as Alex was on his way there and he would already be shoveling noodles into his mouth like he couldn’t wait. It made him smile on days that he struggled to find something to smile about.

After a week of near-isolation since Alex worked at home, he left a little earlier for dinner. The next day, he left a little earlier than that. Then a little earlier, a little earlier, a little earlier until he walked out of his apartment at the same time as the husband. They shared polite smiles and walked the same path, Alex always staying a few feet behind him. They didn’t speak, but it gave him a little more solace to know he wasn’t alone.

They did that every day for the next week until the husband didn’t come for a few days. He never even learned his name.

“I missed you,” Alex said, grabbing David in a hug when he got home from his business trip. He’d offered to pick him up from the airport, but the offer had been declined on the account that David wanted to relax before he got home. Yet, he still didn’t seem relaxed.

“Give me a moment, will you? I’ll see you in bed,” David promised him, peeling him off as he went to the bathroom for a bathroom.

David got in on the other side of the bed and didn’t touch him once.

-

Michael assumed it was common.

As newlyweds, they needed space so they didn’t get tired of each other too fast. Caroline always came home to him, so there was no harm. Well, until she  _ didn’t  _ always come home. She started needing to go on business trips with her employer, halfheartedly explaining that, as an assistant, she was needed. It got worse when she insisted they move into a new apartment.

Michael moved all of the furniture himself and he decorated the apartment himself. Caroline was home less and less and he began wondering if she’d notice if he messed with things. Each week, he’d move something from its place and wait until she noticed. She never did.

Still, Michael survived. He was a florist and he kept himself busy at work, enjoying the excited faces of young boys getting bouquets for their first girlfriends and rolling his eyes as the panicked husbands who’d done wrong and needed a gift. He’d bring Caroline flowers often, but he eventually stopped when she was rarely home to receive them. But it was okay. It was hard to allow himself to feel lonely when he was around people all day.

The moment he noticed that the word to describe his feelings was indeed loneliness was when he began walking to the market with his neighbor. They never spoke or shared names, but their silent walk had begun to be one of Michael’s favorite parts of the day. Which made him feel guilty.

When Caroline had first begun dating him and she discovered he was bisexual, she’d been so hesitant. She told him that she couldn’t trust him to be faithful, but he promised that he was. He always was. He assured her every time she accused him that he was faithful to her forever. She had full access to his phone, to his social media, to his computer to check whenever she got scared every week or so. He even married her to prove his loyalty. Walking and having dinner with the man next door felt like he was lying, like he was too close to being unfaithful. That man was beautiful, but he refused to hurt her. So he decided to stop walking with him.

“Let me check your phone,” Caroline demanded when he went to greet her after she got home from her business trip. He didn’t even get a hug in before she asked. He’d offered to pick her up from the airport, but she said her employer already got her a car and she didn’t want to mess up the plans. 

“I haven’t done anything this week, but okay,” Michael agreed, handing it over, “I’ve missed you so much.”

She walked away with his phone in her hand without saying anything back.

-

Alex’s suspicions started when he tried to hug David from behind and he tilted his phone out of his line of view.

“Why are you hiding your phone?” Alex laughed, trying to kiss his cheek. David shrugged him off and got up to leave the room. Alex decided not to follow him. He was too scared to follow him. 

He sat and pondered for a while. Had he done something wrong? Was David angry at him? The longer he thought about, the more he felt like that had to be the case. Maybe he wasn’t trying hard enough. So he followed him into the bedroom.

“Are you mad at me?” Alex asked, “Did I forget something?”

“I’m not mad at you, Alex,” David sighed, looking at him with bored eyes. It was frustrating to see that and it hurt him in a place that he didn’t realize just a look could. Someone who used to look at him with love just… wasn’t anymore. He swallowed hard. “I just need my privacy.”

“All you have is privacy!” Alex argued, “You-you don’t even touch me anymore. Either you’re mad at me or you think I’m ugly or something! What did I do to make you not want me?”

“You want me to touch you? Then come here,” David demanded. Alex blinked in surprise, but slowly made his way closer to David. He wasn’t really in the mood to do anything physical after feeling so rejected, but he would take it when he didn’t want it if it meant he got something at all. David grabbed his hand and pulled him down, giving him a kiss that didn’t last. “There.”

“That’s it?” Alex asked. David scoffed.

“What do you want from me? I work all damn day to provide for you, but you can’t even appreciate that. I don’t have the time to just fuck you all day,” David said. Alex took a step away from him, trying not to feel to angry.

“I’m not asking you to. I’m asking you to love me,” Alex almost pleaded, “Please just  _ love me. _ ”

David stared at him, angry and maybe even a little guilty. But he simply stared and Alex didn’t know if he was supposed to say something or not. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do after this.

“Are you cheating on me?” Alex asked softly, voice breaking. David scoffed and stood up. “Are you?”

“I can’t believe you’d even ask me that,” he spat, pushing past Alex and storming into the bathroom with his phone in tow.

Maybe he got a little paranoid after that.

Alex paid more attention to things. Their bank account, the amount of time David was on his phone, how he smelled when he came home after late nights or business trips, the new checkered blue tie he got from a coworker that he’d always insisted before wasn’t his style. He noticed that some things correlated too much with his neighbor’s wife next door. One night, a little curious as to why a few hundred dollars came from their bank account in the middle of the afternoon, Alex called his office. His assistant answered.

And wouldn’t you know that voice was the same one he heard when he called David in the middle of the night when he was on his “business trip”.

-

“Where’d this come from?” 

Michael stared at the really expensive bag that was in his wife’s closet. He knew they didn’t have the money for that kind of thing. Any time they spent more than $50 on something, it was something they spoke about beforehand. It’s how they paid their bills.

“What are you doing in my closet?” Caroline demanded instead, anger laced in her tone, “Don’t go through my things, what is wrong with you?!” 

“I-I wasn’t, I was trying to find my shirt, it wasn’t in my stuff,” Michael explained, letting her grab him by the bicep and drag him out of the closet like he was a child. He tried to be gentle as he pulled away. “Where’d that bag come from, Caroline? That bag is hundreds of dollars.”

“My employer gave it to me,” she said stubbornly. Michael furrowed his eyebrows and scoffed.

“Why the hell would he do that?” he asked. Caroline rolled her eyes and shook her head.

“I’m not going to explain to you what it means to be good to your workers.”

“No, I know what that is, but usually that’s, like, a cash bonus. That’s a personal gift,” Michael pointed out. Caroline scoffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

“What are you trying to say, Michael?” she asked. He blinked a few times and he tried to make sense of  _ why  _ her boss would get her a personal gift. The first idea that popped into his head felt like a lie. There was no way she would cheat on him. She was always so scared he would cheat, so he knew she would never. Right?

“Is he creepy or something?” Michael asked because that seemed like the next step. Caroline scoffed.

“No! David is a good boss, you just don’t get it. Now stop going through my shit.”

Michael needed to clear his head and try to make sense of it, so he excused himself to go to the market. As he exited his apartment, he noticed his neighbor doing the same. He looked a little rumpled and sad, but he gave Michael a smile nonetheless.

“Are you alright?” Michael asked him, unable to stop himself. His neighbor looked like he’d been crying and, well, they were sort of friends. They’d never spoken, but still.

His neighbor sniffled just a little and nodded. “Yeah, it’s just been a long day. Need comfort food.”

“Same,” Michael sighed. They stared at each other for a moment and Michael realized that it didn’t have to be close to cheating. He could just have a friend. “Hey, do you want to go together? Just, like, as friends, I mean. Nothing creepy.”

“Um,” his neighbor said, looking around before nodding, “Okay.”

“I’m Michael, by the way.”

“Alex.”

They walked side by side this time, stepping in time on purpose until Alex noticed and smiled. It was charming and Michael couldn’t deny that. 

“So,” he said, speaking when he realized Alex wasn’t going to, “What’s your husband’s name?”

“Oh, um, David,” Alex said, nodding slightly. Michael watched as he looked up and blinked a bit. Something hit him in the chest at that moment and it felt a little too obvious, a little too easy. Life was never  _ that  _ easy.

“What’s he do for a living?” Michael asked. Alex tugged his sleeves over his palms.

“Manages a marketing branch or something. Not too educated on what he does,” he said, forcing a lighthearted laugh.

When they got to the market, Michael held the door open and Alex gave him a smile. They walked together in silence again, never really parting as Alex got his salad from a vegan stand and Michael got his ramen from the ramen stand. For the first time, they sat down together.

“So,” Alex started this time, “That bag I saw your wife with the other day… Where’d she get it?”

Michael eyed him. He took a small bite of his salad, trying to seem nonchalant as he did so. It was hard to tell if he knew what he was asking, so Michael tried to play along.

“Why, do you want to get one for yourself?” Michael asked. Alex smiled almost to himself and shrugged his shoulder, looking up at Michael through his eyelashes.

“Maybe.”

“Well, I’d have to ask her since her boss got it for her,” Michael said. Alex simply nodded. “But… That reminds me of that tie I saw your husband wearing when he left for work the other morning, the blue checkered one. Do you know where he got it? My wife likes ties like that.”

Alex licked his lips and sighed, leaning back in his chair.

“Not sure, he got it from a coworker,” he said. They locked eyes, both unable to give a smile either way. They both knew. Michael just didn’t want to really believe it. But a man named David wearing a tie so similar to the one she’d forced him to wear at their wedding who happened to work at a marketing company? He didn’t believe in coincidences. Alex tilted his head a bit. “They must think we’re so stupid.”

“What exactly are you getting at?” Michael asked. Alex’s smile was rueful.

“I believe you know.” 

Michael dropped his fork with a sigh.

Again, they stared at each other for a few minutes, trying to decide what happens from here. How exactly was one supposed to handle discovering the person they loved was cheating on them with their neighbor? Did the affair start before they moved into the apartment? Was that why she was so set on moving there?

Without more discussion, they both picked up their forks and finished their meals in silence. They walked home together in silence. It was a strange sense of camaraderie with a man he didn’t know very well at all. Hell, they had nothing in common. Except their spouses.

“Goodnight, Michael,” Alex said as they got to their doors.

“Goodnight, Alex.”

They both went inside to face these people who betrayed them. Michael wasn’t sure what Alex’s plan was, but he kept his ears trained for any sign of yelling. It never came.

Caroline was in the shower when he got home and he quickly got into bed. He needed to think more before he approached her about it. He had no evidence, not really. He just couldn’t seem to think of a valid reason otherwise. Even if he didn’t understand why she always thought he was cheating when she was the real culprit.

She got into bed and shuffled around a bit.

“Are you not going to tell me goodnight?” she asked after he didn’t speak. Michael breathed a heavy breath of submission.

“Night.”

-

Alex walked beside Michael to the market the next evening.

“How do you think it began?”

“I’m not sure.”

Alex got his salad and Michael got his ramen and they sat at the same table as yesterday. They took bites in silence, casually glancing at each other as they tried to understand. What was so bad about them that they didn’t deserve the respect of being told it was over?

Alex stopped halfway through his meal, placing his fork down and straightening his posture. 

“Do you have those papers I asked for?” he said. Michael looked up at him, green eyes wide and curious and noodles pooling out of his mouth. He seemed to understand and he swallowed his bite, clearing his throat as he sat up straight as well. Only, he leaned forward, mimicking a way someone might sit if they wanted attention on their breasts rather than their face.

“Of course,” he said, “I hope they’re up to your standard.”

“They’re always up to my standard when they’re from you.”

“No,” Michael intercepted, “She wouldn’t fall for that.”

“Okay,” Alex said, readjusting in his seat and clasping his hands in front of him, “Why don’t you show me privately?”

“Well, I’d have to tell my husband I’m staying late,” Michael answered.

“Please do. We have a lot of work to take care of.”

Michael stared at him for a moment before he scrunched up his nose, shrugging his shoulders.

“I don’t know, that sounds so forced,” he said. Alex nodded.

“You’re right. That couldn’t be it.”

-

“And how would you feel about coming on a business trip with me? I need your assistance.”

Michael let out a wistful sigh, batting his eyelashes Alex’s way as they took the long way to the market. Alex smiled in a way that felt more slimy than he actually was, trying his best to capture the true form of his husband.

“Oh? And what would my benefits be for that?” Michael asked.

“You know I’d take care of you,” Alex told him.

“In what ways?”

“No, he’s not explicit like that,” Alex cut in. Michael nodded and they paused their steps to backtrack their scene.

“Well, you make it sound so convincing,” Michael corrected. Alex walked with an uncharacteristic swagger.

“So you’ll come then?”

“Would my room be close to yours?”

“Absolutely,” Alex confirmed. Michael smiled.

“Then gladly.” They walked a few steps more, falling out of character as they did so. When Michael looked over at him, he was holding back a laugh. “What?”

“It just feels so cliche, you know? That it’d be before a business trip. I feel like even they aren’t that cliche,” Alex explained. Michael shrugged with a smile.

“Yeah, you’re right. It had to be some other way.”

Alex turned to him with a look in his eye as he schooled his features. Michael tried to get back into character as well as Alex tilted his head back just a little.

“I’m bored. Take off your clothes.”

Michael couldn’t keep it together at that, laughter bubbling out of him to the point he bent over. Alex laughed with him helplessly.

“How did you keep a straight face when you said that?!” Michael asked, looking to Alex with unashamed wonder, “Where did that even come from? Oh my god, dude.”

Alex snorted, shaking his head at him. “From some show, I don’t know. What, you don’t think that’s possibly what happened?”

“Not a chance.”

Michael bought his salad that evening.

-

“My husband’s bisexual. Forgive me for being so blunt, but he doesn’t always answer my questions.”

Alex watched as Michael stirred his tea with his finger and then sucked it off. He’d gotten frustrated with work and decided meeting up with Michael for a lunch break sounded good. He was correct.

“That’s a shame. I’m an open book,” Alex said in a low tone, channeling his inner David. It came easy when you knew a man for six years, one of which was entirely the seduction part. Alex was nothing if not stubborn. “Ask me what you want.”

“Do you really enjoy being with women? Or was that just what held you over until you found a man so you could be gay?” Michael asked. Alex could tell that question haunted him, something that he was probably asked more than once. He moved closer to the edge of his seat.

“I love being with women,” Alex said, the words foreign in his mouth, “It’s all soft skin and curves. I miss it sometimes. There are just some things my husband can’t provide.”

Michael sighed, elongating his neck and dragging his fingertips across it as he pushed his hair back. Alex watched each movement before going back to his eyes.

“What else do you miss about being with women?” Michael asked.

“I’m afraid all of my answers might be inappropriate.”

“Oh, I don’t mind.”

Things got a little too real as Michael’s foot dragged up Alex’s metal leg. Realization hit his eyes, but he never reacted and he never broke character. So Alex didn’t either, accepting the way Michael switched to his foot being between his legs to drag up the one he could actually feel. Alex ignored the way his heart raced.

“Tell me what you miss.”

“Strong thighs,” Alex said, leaning forward just a bit, “Long hair. Boobs.”

And somehow that got him to break character, a perfectly  _ Michael  _ smile breaking out onto his lips as a tiny giggle fell from him and his foot broke contact. Alex smiled back, letting his shoulders fall.

“What?” he asked.

“Boobs,” Michael repeated, laughing a little harder. Alex threw his arms out in defense.

“Listen, I’ve never had to flirt with a woman before, I don’t know what I’m supposed to call them,” Alex laughed. Michael shook his head, trying to dial back his amusement. But his amusement was honestly just too cute and Alex couldn’t help but soak it up while it lasted. It was in these moments that he didn’t feel so alone.

“Well, personally, I don’t call them anything when I’m trying to seduce someone because I don’t think there is a sexy word for them,” Michael defended. Alex scoffed.

“C’mon, there has to be one because erotica novels exist, right?” Alex pointed out, “Breasts? Tits? Fuckin’... chest balls?”

“ _ What _ ?” Michael demanded, his voice raising a few pitches before he threw his head back in laughter and he held his stomach. A few people looked over at them in curiosity, but Alex’s eyes stayed on him.

“I don’t know!”

“You are so lucky you’re gay, man,” Michael said, slowly but surely dialling down his laughter. Alex watched him with a smile as he did so.

“Hey,” Alex started once he calmed down, “So, you know how I write for a queer magazine, right? Well, what’d’you say about working with me about how it is to be a bisexual man when it’s still a struggle?”

“You wanna interview me?” Michael asked. Alex nodded.

“Yeah,” he said. Michael shrugged.

“Okay, sounds good.”

-

They decided the least suspicious way to carry out the interview would be in a motel room. They couldn’t do it at either one of their apartments because if their spouses found out, it’d be quite obvious that they knew about what was going on between them. They weren’t quite ready for that yet. Hell, they didn’t even  _ understand  _ that yet. Even if months had passed since they realized.

But the unforeseen problem came when their agreed upon day rolled around and Alex’s stump was too swollen to fit into his prosthetic. He was sore and frustrated, but they agreed. So Alex got his crutches and slowly made his way to his car, ignoring the throbbing. 

Michael was waiting outside of the motel room for him, but he couldn’t help but meet him halfway when he saw he was on crutches. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. Alex gave him a tired smile.

“Yeah, just, um, just a bad leg day,” Alex explained. Michael gave an exaggerated frown.

“Well, is there anything I can do?” he wondered. Alex shook his head.

“Not really. Can you get my laptop though, please?” Alex asked. Michael agreed without hesitance. 

A few minutes later, they found themselves sitting on opposite sides of a queen sized bed. Alex was sitting with his laptop propped on his lap, mindlessly rubbing at his stump as he asked questions. Michael couldn’t help himself as he scooted a little closer.

“I can massage it if you want, I bet that’ll help some of the aching,” Michael offered. Alex eyed him suspiciously. “Nothing weird, I promise, I just hate seeing that you’re in pain.”

“No one but my doctor and my PT have touched it since I lost it,” Alex admitted. Michael stared at him, unsure if that was a rejection or not. But then Alex untied the knot at the end of his sweats and hiked them up over his knee.

“Just tell me if you want me to stop.”

Michael scooted closer and pulled Alex’s stump into his lap, touching it gently at first. They never spoke about how he lost it, but Michael knew it couldn’t have been easy. The skin was warm to the touch and his underworked muscles were tense, clearly in need of a rougher pair of hands from a different angle than its owner. So he got to work.

Alex’s head fell back against the wall and Michael tried not to look. It was harder than he expected though. Soft little noises were coming from this man he’d spent nearly every day with these last few months, sharp intakes of breaths and desperately controlled moans. He tried to keep his thoughts in a pure place as he massaged harder and Alex’s noises got more unhinged. He wasn’t a cheater and neither was Alex. He was helping a friend who was hurting.

“Thank you,” Alex said once he was done, face flushed, “Sorry if I‒”

“No, it’s okay,” Michael said, smiling at him, “I understand.”

Michael went home that night feeling guilty and Alex went home that night feeling it even moreso. They both tried to be good, tried not to think about their friend in that way when their spouse was in the next room. But somehow, as they took their own separate showers, their thoughts went to each other. It was easy to touch themselves to the thought of finally being touched by someone else again. 

By the time the next day rolled around and Alex was still haunting his brain, he knew it’d gone too far. Even though it wasn’t what his wife was doing, it still felt so wrong. He was married and yet he hadn’t thought about his wife in too long. He was too busy thinking about his neighbor.

And still as his lunch break rolled around, he couldn’t help but dial Alex’s number.

“Hey, is everything alright?” Alex asked when he picked up. They never spoke over the phone. They didn’t even text. They had each other’s numbers for emergencies only. How could Michael explain that this was an emergency?

“I just needed to hear your voice,” he admitted shamefully.

“Okay,” Alex said softly. It was clear that he also thought it was too far. They’d crossed a line and nothing real had even happened. How the hell did his wife do this and so much more without guilt? He couldn’t do this anymore. “I’m writing your article.”

Maybe one more day.

“Read it to me?”

“Of course.”

-

“We shouldn’t do this.”

“But‒”

“I’m married!”

“So am I,” Alex said as David on purpose, but as himself on accident. Because it made sense a little to him now. Sometimes you just couldn’t control who you fell in love with. “But I can’t resist you anymore.”

Michael looked at him, face torn between desire and hesitance. He was leaning against a tree that was in a park that was technically on the way to the market. It was a simple detour, but it was dark and they were alone and he looked beautiful. 

“David,” Michael said, shaking his head, “This is wrong.”

“I know it is, Caroline,” Alex answered, stepping closer. 

Yesterday, they’d crossed a line. They touched and while it was meant to be platonic, it felt like more when  _ Alex  _ felt more. They’d spoken on the phone and that should’ve been platonic, but it couldn’t be when  _ Michael  _ felt more. They both knew it was more. They both knew it was wrong.

This had to be their last reenactment. This had to be the right one.

“You make it so hard to resist you,” Michael told him, “They way you carry yourself like that. You’ve been through so much and yet you’re still so strong.”

“Me?” Alex scoffed, shoving his hands in his pockets in an attempt to keep them to himself, “God, I’m just trying to survive around you. You flaunt yourself for me, I know it. The way you dress, the way you do your hair, the way you say my name…”

Alex was in his space before he even knew it. They were so close, hardly a centimeter apart. If either one of them breathed just a little harder, their chests would touch. That had never happened before. Until it did.

“Alex,” Michael said, his hands going up to press into Alex’s chest. Their foreheads met as Alex held onto his wrists, keeping them close. 

“Just like that.”

They shared breaths, so close he could kiss him if he wanted. And he wanted. But Alex couldn’t bring himself to do it and Michael couldn’t either, yet neither of them could manage to break contact. He wanted this. He wanted  _ him _ . 

“I can’t be them,” Michael whispered, tears building in his eyes, “I won’t be them.”

“I know,” Alex agreed, nodding slightly against him. He couldn’t move away though and Michael didn’t push him. “I didn’t… I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“I know.”

They breathed more and slowly, slowly Michael’s fingers locked with Alex’s. Alex felt more in that moment than he did on his wedding night. He didn’t have the heart to ask Michael if it was the same for him.

“I love you,” he admitted, telling him and the darkness and no one else. He could see those tears falling down Michael’s cheeks as he clutched his hands.

“I love you too,” Michael said, voice breaking, “But I can’t. I won’t. I won’t do this. I won’t be like them. I’m not a cheater. Neither are you.”

“I know,” Alex agreed, “I know.”

They stayed there, trying to work up the courage to leave the one place of comfort they’d found in years. Michael was able to gently push him away first, their grips on each other unraveling as they put more and more space.

The space kept getting bigger and bigger until Michael was out of sight. Alex didn’t realize he was crying too until he was gone completely. His heart ached like it never had before, a new shade of loneliness tearing into his gut with no sign of stopping.

He leaned against the tree and sobbed until he could remember how to walk.

**-three years later-**

Alex stood in his house with pride.

He’d signed his first lease by himself with no roommates and that felt  _ good.  _ Everything felt good. He was three years single, two years out of Roswell, and one year of feeling like the man he knew he could be. That was a good thing.

Still, even though three years had passed, he thought of Michael regularly. He’d see ramen and smile at the sloppy way he shoved it into his mouth. He’d see curly hair and feel his heart try to escape his chest. He’d hear wild laughter and he’d miss him a little more.

It was hard at first. He avoided going outside until he finally managed to tell David it was over, but by then Michael had already ended it with Caroline and moved somewhere else. He never got the chance to really say goodbye which seemed to hurt even more. Every once in a while he’d be tempted to call him, so he eventually deleted his number so he wouldn’t have anything to be tempted by. That was when he finally was able to get the hell out of Roswell and move to Santa Fe. Maybe it wasn’t much of an upgrade, but he felt it.

He felt it and he was ready to move on, to try again.

With a content sigh, Alex made his way outside so he could go grocery shopping for the first time for his new house. He locked the door behind and made his way to his car, unlocking it just as his neighbor locked theirs. Human instinct caused him to look up at the sound and he had to do a double take as a man with unmistakable curls stood in the driveway beside his.

Alex stood frozen, unwilling to believe this was real until he saw his face. Hell, even when they locked eyes, he couldn’t believe it was real. In what world was he allowed to live beside this man twice? What was this?

“Alex?” Michael said, his voice so real that Alex nearly fell to the ground. He held onto his car for balance, staring at him. Michael came closer in slow strides and all Alex could do was think of why he deserved this.

Perhaps this was his good karma for doing the right thing.

“Michael?” Alex said even as he stepped up to him. And Michael smiled that same brilliant smile. Tears came to Alex’s eyes without warning at the sight and it made that smile fall.

“Are you alright?” he asked, stepping closer. Alex let out a breathy laugh and nodded.

“Yeah. I really am.”

He deserved this.

**Author's Note:**

> also on my tumblr: spaceskam


End file.
